Warning: The below content will be a rant. Filled with juicy cynicism with a side serving of rage. Don’t say I didn’t warn you…
OKAY! So for a moment, let’s forget the fact there are LINES on the road and let’s just put in place a complete road-anarchy where we all drive where we like, on whichever side of the road we like, and cut all corners out completely. Let’s just DRIVE and see what happens… Weee!!
Do you picture, in this moment, a chaotic bloodied mess with smashed glass, dented bonnets, buckled wheels, doors coming off hinges, steam, smoke and flames, and people who can no longer be identified by their passport photo? I do!
This rant begins from me stopping at one of those traffic light intersections, which are singular lane/one lane on the road type scenarios much like this:
(ignore the fact this diagram is driving on the right side of the road like they do in France, it was a cut and paste job)
In these situations we all have to wait at the lights one behind the other, naturally, as logic would dictate…ya know?
There’s no line on the road in this instance to indicate that there are TWO lanes going forward that then have to merge as they get to the other side… there’s no merge at all because we were already all merged!! There’s no such thing as a 0.5 lane unless you chop a car in half and miraculously still drive it. It’s therefore an imaginary merge with imaginary lines which the ‘give way to who’s in front’ rule doesn’t apply as it’s ONLY ONE LANE and thus a near-miss altercation situation if you merge and over take! Hopefully you get the picture…
So what happened here, on this singular piece of logical road, was that someone crept up sneakily on the inside. At first glance I figured this would be because they’re going to turn the corner, but instead this guy kept driving straight on in order to jump in front of traffic by causing me to brake and let him in. I consequently beeped my horn at this reprehensible desperado as he cut in front of me and effectively everyone else, who were waiting patiently in single file as you would on a singular piece of road.
In response to my self-righteous air of disapproval, he threw his hand up in the air and glanced at me with such a barbaric frown, which I glimpsed in his side mirror, that I bet he probably doesn’t have to hit his wife as I’m sure that look on it’s own would inflict pain! (though I do surmise that he would be the physical sort too by the look of him!).
I guess what annoys me the most out of this entire tirade is not only did this guy feel he deserved to cut the queue like an arsehole with a sore thumb would jump in front of an invalid person in a hospital who’s been waiting desperately for hours to be seen by a surgeon because they’re about to go into cardiac-arrest as well as their leg falling off, but he also thought he was RIGHT in doing so! He did not see any error in his ways as seemed to think it was OKAY to drive alonside others on a singular piece of road. In his world, this road was made for him to do whatever the hell he wants at the expense of whoever’s headlight he happens to swipe in the process. “It’s OKAY because I was PRETENDING that there was a merge up ahead and, oh gwarsh, in my bony head they just forgot to draw the lines on! Hyuck!”
(that last bit was me trying to think like him. If you didn’t get it…)
Bottom line bucko, we all have to wait our turn in life for things to happen. From what I’ve seen, in most cases those who cut corners and rush ahead of the pack usually hit a brick wall. Only difference here is this might be quite a literal fate for you!
Rant over!
Face-palm 